Redefining A Relationship

March 4th, 2008

So… Tom and I broke up over the weekend.

It wasn’t a bad breakup. There was no fighting. Nobody is mad, we don’t hate each other, we don’t resent each other, we don’t regret anything… we’re just not very good as a couple. We’ve had a few problems lately, and while things were getting better, they weren’t really going the direction that they “should” have gone. We’ve been getting along a lot better, but mostly in the platonic ways.

I could get really detailed about a lot of reasons why it’s better in the long run that we just be friends, but really, there’s no point. I’m slowly making my peace with it. I’ve had some good friends listen to me, my puppy is snuggling with me and I have a lot of things to look forward with. I’m starting a new job soon, and I am looking forward to meeting a lot of new people there and making new, local friends.

A lot of people that know us seem to think that it’s a temporary thing, and that in a few weeks we’ll get back together. I’ve kind of thought about that a bit, and I don’t think that would be the right thing to do. And it’s not because I don’t love him, or because I think he doesn’t love me, or because I don’t want to try to work it out… it’s because I think ultimately, while we probably could make it work, we can both find somebody that is better suited to us. We just need different things, and I don’t think it’s fair to either one of us to make compromises as huge as we’ve had to make.

It’ll take a little time, and it may be a little awkward or painful for a while, but I think in the end, I’ll be happy to be able to call him my friend. I know everything is going to turn out just fine… I just wish that knowing all of this would make me feel better about it. 

  Everyday Life   permalink   3 comments   09:58 AM

Anniversary of a Fresh Start

March 1st, 2008

Well, it’s been a year since I moved to Portland. It kind of seems like just yesterday in a way.

So, it’s not really as cold and wet here as everybody made it out to be. Yeah, it gets cold, and yeah, it rains, but it’s doesn’t pour 10 and half months out of the year like everybody made it sound.

I don’t have all that many friends. I feel like I should know more people for as long as I have been here, but I don’t. I would feel sad about it, but the more I think about it, I didn’t have as many friends in L.A. as I should have for as long as I was there. So, whatever. Story of my life I guess haha.

I’m going to be starting a new job in a couple weeks. I am pretty excited. My current one was good for a while, and helped me get my feet on the ground, but now it’s time to move on to different things.

I thought I had everything all situated now, but sometimes things don’t always go as planned. Sometimes things get turned upside down unexpectedly. There’s an area of my life right now that’s sort of up in the air… I think I know what the outcome of it will be but I’m going to let the dust settle a little bit, because sometimes things don’t go as planned.

I feel kind of terrible right now, this is not how I wanted today to be. But I feel confidant that things will look up soon. It’s all a learning experience, and an adventure… or something.

  Everyday Life   permalink   5 comments   03:14 PM