{blank}ing While Driving

In the past few years, most of America has passed legislation to prohibit talking on a cell phone without a headset, and more recently, texting while driving. Since the majority of America is totally and completely not capable of safely and responsibly multi-tasking, I am perfectly okay with these new laws. In fact, I’d rather like to see them expanded to other things, because I see stuff all the time that surely can’t be any safer. Or, more to the point of why I care, any less annoying to me as the car behind you.

Smoking while driving:
If having a phone conversation while you’re driving is illegal when you have one hand on the phone, but legal if you have a headset on, and thus both hands on the wheel, then smoking while driving shouldn’t be allowed. That takes a hand off the steering wheel, and your eyes off the road if you actually use your ashtray. Nobody does, though, which adds the burning embers and cigarette butts that people always throw out the window.

Eating while driving:
See above for the whole “one hand off the steering wheel” thing (which I don’t care about but I think that’s part of what the Law is about). More to the point though, when you’re sitting at the red light unwrapping your food and looking in your lap for that french fry that you dropped, the light will inevitably turn green, and you WILL NOT GO, which will fill me with rage.

Putting on makeup while driving:
Are you serious?! First off, you’re going to poke your eye out like that one day and it’ll be your own fool fault. Second, you should be paying attention to the road in front of and around you, not to your face in the rearview mirror. When you sway out of your lane and sideswipe me, I’m going to be really upset and will probably jam your mascara brush up your nose.

Reading while driving:
I can almost see this being okay at 7:30am on I-5 in the middle of downtown Los Angeles, where it is pretty much a parking lot and you can sit in the same spot for ten minutes, easily. But, that guy that was blocking my intersection this morning, reading a book and as such couldn’t see the murderous glare I was casting on him? NOT COOL, MAN.

You know, at this point, I almost think we should ban “Doing Anything but DRIVING While Driving”. The other day, I watched the guy in the lane next to me almost rear end the car in front of him multiple times because he was too busy gazing at the girl in his car to notice the car stop for red lights/stop signs/the dumb kid that ran into the street. Seriously dude, she’ll still be there when you get where you’re going. Take a picture and pay attention to traffic.

I know that not everybody is that dumb, but sadly, the 99% of people that can’t drive properly are ruining it for those of us that can. One of these days I’ll write a post some of the ways people that actually are paying attention still manage to fill me with rage.

So, what {blank}ing while driving things do you think should be prohibited?

Tags: annoying, driving, laws

2 Responses to “{blank}ing While Driving”

  1. Suzanne Nov 6, 2010 at 10:56 am #

    I vote for the Google option to all this insanity…

    Cars that drive themselves!

    http://www.nytimes.com/2010/10/10/science/10google.html

    • katili Nov 6, 2010 at 11:12 am #

      Brilliant! I was just lamenting the other day that I wished cars drove themselves since clearly most people are too dumb to manage.